I feel like I’ve been able to breathe a little more this week. I’m catching glimpses of myself again and that feels so good. When I find myself thinking of my mom, it’s good happy memories, mostly. I picked up some photo plaques – a photo of Mom standing in her kitchen beaming and a close up of her hands peeling a pear. I put them on my kitchen counter and I smile when I see them. I smile because I see myself in that part of her and I love that.
Year in the Life Week 4
365 Day Photography Project
I’ve been afraid that I’m going to forget her. I’m afraid that all of the little things that make me think of her will just vanish from my brain. It hurts. John recommended I keep a journal, and I’ve already filled pages upon pages. I haven’t forgotten.
Getting outside has helped me, even if just for a little while. The sunshine is like a welcomed hug. I’ve never noticed the birds chirping before, but now it seems they’re singing me a song.
It was a good day – the first since Mom died – and I’m grateful. A board game marathon was just what I needed right now. There’s no room for sadness when strategy is taking up each lobe.
We spent way too much money today, but it was another good day. We finished purchasing furniture for the parlor room – and it’s now my favorite room to be in. On a whim we stopped by Southwestern Minerals and I bought stunning geode bookends.
My mom had a green bowl that belonged to her grandmother – a baking bowl. Months ago, before our move, Hayneedle sent me $100 to use in their store. I graciously accepted and chose a set of 3 green Fiestaware baking bowls (*affiliate link*). Little did I know then how special it would be for me to have a green baking bowl of my own.
I feel refreshed. I joined a club today – The Gem and Mineral Club. I don’t know anything about geology, but I’m excited to learn. I made friends with a few men there. My old friend Bill once told me he felt like it was his lot in life to be surrounded by beautiful women. Sometimes I feel like it’s my lot in life to be surrounded by sweet older men. ??
Every time the sun hit my face today, I smiled. It’s hard to believe colder days are coming, because I need the warmth so desperately. I can’t wait to find refuge in my yard this spring… we just bought the perfect bright blue flower pot for a batch of zinnias.